When networking, manners count

But there is a right way and a wrong way to go about it, etiquette advisers agree

By SANA SIWOLOP
THE NEW YORK TIMES

NEW YORK — While attending a wedding reception in December in Great Neck,
N.Y., Andrea Nierenberg, a corporate trainer from Manhattan, thought it was a
little odd when the guest seated across from her began passing out business
cards.

But she was taken aback when this guest, a stockbroker, began asking everyone
at the table about his or her investments. The next day he called her and some of
the other guests; not only did he want to set up appointments, but he also asked
for phone numbers of other people who might want his advice, she said.

"Networking is all about establishing relationships and building trust, but he
started working on us before we even got to the soup," Nierenberg, 46, said.

Nierenberg’s experience is hardly uncommon. Pressed for time and worried about
the skittish economy, many people have been networking at a frenzied pace,
career and network consultants say, whether to find a job, drum up business,
become appointed to a corporate board or professional organization or even break
into a particular social circle.

But there is a right way and a wrong way to network. To help people learn
networking etiquette, a growing number of courses and seminars are being offered
across the country, and many of the organizers say that they have been filling up
as fast as they are offered.

Nierenberg said the number of networking etiquette courses she has offered
through her company, the Nierenberg Group, has tripled over the past two years.
And Marsha Gordon, president of the Westchester County, N.Y. Chamber of
Commerce, said the best-attended networking round table sponsored by her
group was the one last month about etiquette.

By many accounts, such sessions are needed.

Networking advisers agree on some basics of the skill:

At a company or industry event, don’t stand in a corner, waiting to be
introduced. Reach out to someone graciously, even if it means pointing them to
the appetizers.

Don’t use voice-mail messages for networking. Have live conversations on the
telephone, but keep them to no more than five to seven minutes.

Ask open-ended questions.

Keep note cards on hand so that they can be dashed off quickly. If time is a
problem, first send a thank-you message by e-mail, then follow up with a written
note within a day.

Always follow through. Don’t ignore requests for more information about yourself.

(When I’m going to be at an event where I know there are a number of people I may be able to meet, I carry a mini-recorder. If I make a great contact that I want to follow-up or have been asked to get in touch with, I’ll find an isolated place and dictate who I talked with, their contact info, what we discussed and how I want to follow-up. I can then go on to the next conversation and be able to concentrate on that person instead of trying to remember everything about every conversation.

It goes without saying that everyone should also carry business cards, even if you’re not employed, which have your name, phone and e-mail address at a minimum. If you are looking for a position, having a website with your resume is also helpful and should be noted on the card. If you’re employed, make sure it have your business URL – Russ)

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