What we can learn from kids… (R&D at its purest…?)

if you don’t have kids, you will probably find this pretty hysterical.
if you do, you may not see the humor right away. maybe in a few
years…

The following message was written by an anonymous and obviously
long-suffering mother in Austin, Texas:

Things I’ve learned from my children (honest & no kidding)

1. A king-size waterbed holds enough water to fill the ground floor of a 2000
square ft. house 4 inches deep.

2. If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they will ignite.

3. A 3-year old’s voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded
restaurant.

4. If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is
not strong enough to rotate a 42-lb boy wearing Batman underwear and a
Superman cape. It is strong enough, however, if tied to a paint can, to
spread paint on all four walls of a 20×20 ft. room.

5. You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on. When
using
a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before
you get a hit. A
ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.

6. The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn’t stop a baseball hit
by a ceiling fan.

7. When you hear the toilet flush and the words, "uh oh," it’s already
too late.

8.Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.

9. A six-yearold can start a fire with a flint rock even though a
36-year old man
says they can only do it in the movies.

10. Certain Legos will pass through the digestive tract of a 4-year old.

11. Playdough and microwave should never be used in the same sentence.

12. Unlike love, super glue is forever.

13. No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still can’t
walk on water.

14. Pool filters do not like Jell-O.

15. VCR’s do not eject peanut butter and jelly sandwiches even though TV
commercials show they do.

16. Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.

17. Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.

18. You probably do not want to know what that odor is.

19. Always look in the oven before you turn it on. Plastic toys do not
like ovens.

20. The fire department in Austin, TX, has a 5-minute response time.

21. The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy.

22. It will, however, make cats dizzy.

23. Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.

24. The mind of a 6-year old is wonderful. First
grade…true story: One day the first grade teacher was reading the
story of the Three Little Pigs to her class. She came to the part of the
story where the first pig was trying to accumulate the building
materials for his home. She read, "And so the pig went up to the man
with the wheelbarrow full of straw and said, "Pardon me sir, but may I
have some of that straw to build my house?’" The teacher paused then
asked the class, "And what do you think that man said?" One little boy
raised his hand and said, "I think he said. ‘Holy #@%*! A talking pig!’"
The teacher was unable to teach for the next 10 minutes.

25. 60% of men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and brake fluid.